Your world, your mirror
When we find our world and the people around us acceptable, we say our world is our mirror. When the world around us is violent and destructive, we deny this and say: "Not true."
The world around us is our inner voice made audible. The people around us are saying things to us that we believe inside ourselves. For example, an abusive husband telling his wife how stupid she is every day, is sometimes saying to her exactly what she believes in herself. She hears his words every day and does not stop him because deep within herself is a wound. The husband is mirroring the deep wound in her exactly .
God has concrete ways of showing us things. Sometimes we recognize our good personality traits and sometimes we recognize our lesser good ones. Within us there are traits that we have not come to realize or accept about ourselves. God wants us to know ourselves and when He sees that we have not come to see this "thing" in ourselves, He starts to help us by sending us people with the same traits as ours as if saying: "My child, this is you!"
We will know this is true when the person we are confronted with really creates an intense emotional reaction in us.
The forgetful person will sometimes be surrounded by forgetful people and get very angry with them, because he has not come to recognize the forgetfulness in himself. By finding this forgetfulness that angers him so in others within himself, will help him to accept himself.
A person who likes to control others around him will time and again find people who want to control him and then he gets very upset if he has not recognized this in himself and accepted it. God is saying: "Look my child, this is you! Accept and acknowledge yourself."
The child that comes home every day complaining about bullies may not have come to realize the bullying part in himself and therefore gets angry with the others.
When you have really come to recognize this little part of yourself mirrored by others, you have a chance to heal it. Jung said: "If you want to change your world, change yourself."
Finding the hurt in yourself that is mirrored by others and healing it will leave you with a whole new world around you. New people mean new lessons to learn about youself.
Find the little disowned parts in yourself by carefully looking at the people around you.
Exercise:
Ask yourself what is the one thing that bothers you a lot about someone you know.
Now find the same characteristic in yourself. (It does not have to be the same intensity than the other person, it could be small in your case and strong in the other person).
You will always find the qualities of the other person in yourself.
Acknowledge the part of the other person in yourself. Only by accepting our negative qualities, can we bring healing for ourselves.
Matthew 7:5 - "First remove the wooden beam from your own eye, then you will see clearly to remove the splinter from your brother's eye".
© Copyright 2009-2017 Happy Family Therapy